Calmness of The Nerves
There are individuals whose temper is calm, and others whose
temper is inflamed. The person with a calm temper does not get
upset quickly and perhaps even slowly. It is as if he is an
unshakeable mountain, or like the six great stones which are
exposed to the Nubian Nile which, however much the waves
surge against them, remain calmly fixed in their place,
unaffected by the disturbance around them.
But the person whose nerves are raw is easily agitated, he rants
and raves perhaps for the most trivial of reasons, or for no
reason at all, just because of his inner doubts and imaginings.
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The person whose temper is calm is a strong person because
external factors cannot provoke him but rather his strong nerves
are able to resist them. And because of this inner strength, he
gains people's respect and admiration.
As for the one who is agitated and shouting, however much he
rages and creates a fuss, abuses and threatens, and seems to
frighten others, he does not gain anyone's respect. His agitation
indicates the weakness of his temper, or the weakness of his
character.
If anyone wishes to make a spectacle or an object of ridicule of this
week person, he can. For example, if there is a teacher whose nerves are
weak, he is unable to bear a mistake or outburst from a student,
so that any pupil could say to his classmate, "Do you want to
see me make this teacher get all worked up? " He isn't dreaded
to the pupils at all. He just looks ridiculous. So then he behaves
in a way that he knows will provoke the teacher and then sits
back to watch!
Calm nerves depend on two things: the physical state and the
psychological. There are many physiological reasons for the
nerves to become exhausted but we will not go into them all
now. We will turn our attention here to a physical cause which
often drains people's nerves, even the best of people, and that is
tiredness. If the body is exhausted because of tiredness and
strain, then the nerves get to the point of being unable to bear
anything.
My advice to you if you find yourself in such a situation is, not
to enter into a long conversation or lengthy discussion with
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anyone, especially with those who hold rigid views, and who are
not easily persuaded. It is not right, in such a state of
exhaustion, to try and decide important matters or solve
problems. Take care not to get into arguments when you are
exhausted, for you may lose your temper.
The state of exhaustion requires sleep, or at least rest and
relaxation. Your loved ones must take note of your state of
tiredness and not draw you into a discussion or try to solve
problems while you are in such a state.
One of the ways to aid calmness of the nerves is the spirit of joy
and cheerfulness. Cheerfulness produces in the body a state of
relaxation which soothes the nerves. All those who are
characterised by a cheerful spirit have tranquil nerves and do
not get agitated easily. They may meet provocation with a
sense of humour that makes those who are trying to provoke
them laugh too, so that the matter subsides. Those who are
narrow minded and straitlaced, who imagine that laughter is a
sin, you will often find that their nerves are tense. The strict
severity with which they meet people's behaviour often makes
the atmosphere lose its tranquillity and the situation become
aggravated. I hope to return to this point, God willing, when we
speak about the factors which contribute to calmness. But let
us continue on straightaway to talk about the harm which
results from nerves that lack tranquillity.
The person whose nerves are easily agitated harms himself as a
result, and also harms others. He harms himself with mental
illnesses, heart disease and high blood pressure and also various
psychological illnesses which result from his over
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reacting and angry outbursts. He may be forced to take
tranquillisers, and sleeping pills to try to calm his nerves for a
while, then the stress returns once again through psychological
motives from within and external provocation, and he again
resorts to tranquillisers! His nerves become like elastic, which
through constant stretching and slackening loses its elasticity
and is ruined.
Such a person enters the whirlpool of problems caused by
nervous illnesses. Although medicine tries to treat the
symptoms, the more important thing is to treat the reasons
behind the nervous problems, and at the outset try to convince
the person of the need to be calm. Calm souls do not suffer
from nervous illness and have no need for tranquillisers because
they are peaceful by nature.
The person who can control and calm his nerves can also
control his words and not make mistakes. Likewise he can
control his behaviour and be in command of himself, thus
winning rather than losing in situations in which he is involved.
All these things require a healthy spiritual attitude and an inner
conviction in the individual that he can preserve his character,
his rights and his dignity by being calm. He must realise that
nervous outbursts are a clear mistake. This is an obvious
weakness before other people which loudly proclaims that the
individual concerned is unable to solve his problems using
reason and logic in a calm way and thus resorts to nervous
outbursts. The person whose nerves flare up is giving an
indication that evil has got the better of him and he has been
unable to resist it, which is why he flared up; while the Apostle
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says: "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with
good." (Rom.12:21).
Someone who has irritable nerves is a person who has no
resistance and who has collapsed inside, while someone who
has calm nerves is a resilient and fully composed person.
Stillness of The Tongue
Someone with a peaceful manner of speaking is loved by all, but
a restless tongue makes its owner make many errors. There are
various outward signs of a restless tongue which we may
mention:
1.
The talkative tongue, which never stops talking, while
the Bible says: "In the multitude of words sin is not lacking,"(Prov. 10:19). It is a tongue which talks continuously on any
subject, even on things that are beyond its scope and
knowledge. It cannot keep quiet. It cannot control itself to
within its lips and teeth. It has to go out and talk, and just
cannot stop at all, even on the finer points of science and
politics! The main thing is that it talks and that is enough, even
about other people's affairs, their secrets and personal matters.
It is a restless tongue. And due to its restlessness, its owner
cannot control it or subdue it. The Apostle James says: "If
anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle
his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one's religion is
useless." (James 1:26). Therefore every person needs to curb
his tongue and not leave it free to wander restlessly from one
subject to another, without restraint. If he is unable to do this,
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then let him pray and say: "Set a guard, O LORD, over my
mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips." (Ps. 141:3).
2. tasbeha.org/content/hh_books/Calmness/index.html